January 29th - February 2nd, 2024
Life Counseling & THARS Conference
Summary
After the last conference, Sandra has been invited by Dr. Niyonzima and his staff to teach more about Positive Parenting, something she mentioned last time she was in Burundi. The last conference included a section on how to raise children without using violence. It was a quick one day training, but it was something the counselors from THARS have been asking about ever since.
Unfortunately in Burundi, many children are disciplined using harsh forms of punishment and they do not have as many protections under the law. Because children face strict and violent discipline practices all over Burundi, they grow to think about violence as a viable option since it is modeled for them. We believe, along with the counselors at THARS, that if children are raised with positive reinforcement and non-violent social consequences, violence will not become their primary recourse.
Dr. Niyonzima is an innovator in the field and has transformed the face of mental health in Burundi. Because the work in his country, we have invited Dr. Niyonzima to train our counselors and community partners on Community Healing Through Trauma Informed Care. In post-conflict Burundi, Dr. Niyonzima and THARS have worked tirelessly to address trauma both through individualized care and community programs. We believe David’s expertise in Community Healing in the aftermath of war can help our counselors become better equipped to address the complex trauma that our clients may have as refugees, veterans, and survivors.
Day 1: Our Arrival
It has been four years since I made the trip to Burundi, and for Carlos it had been 17 years since he was in this part of the world. Neither of us remember the trip being so long and difficult. We left at 1:30pm on a Thursday from Portland and traveled non-stop for a total of 26 hours on a flight and 14 hours stuck in airports. We arrived at 1:15 pm in Burundi (which was 3:00 am Portland time). Neither of us had slept much, maybe 4-6 hours each and we were exhausted.
My good friend David (our host) picked me up from the airport and there was no time to rest. Our first stop was the THARS office where we dropped off money and gifts for David. He had asked for us to bring some American essentials including instant oatmeal, granola bars, Old Spice deodorant and toothpaste. David told us that he is selfish with his granola and keeps them in his office rather than at home since he doesn’t want anyone else to eat them.
We stopped by his home in Bujumbura for a quick drop off of suitcases and 20 minutes to clean up and we were off to experience our first Burundian wedding reception. Apparently the wedding service had already taken place and we were simply going to the reception. Of course the wedding reception different. The guests sat in a semi-circle around the bride and groom. Once they arrived there was what they call “The Sharing of Words”. Sharing of Words is an opportunity for each family to give respect, tell stories and announce their gifts. Among the gifts at this reception were a cow, some agricultural land and a lesson on agriculture. David mentioned afterwards that if families don’t have cows to give or land they can give the equivalent of money. What David did when his son got married is that he gave his son free rent for two years in a home they own. One of the interesting things that we witnessed was instead of louder clapping and yelling , we heard a sound that sounded something like an “Eeeeeeeeeee”. David told us that this is the traditional way of Burundians expressing joy. At one point about 10 lovely dressed women entered and began to make their way through the crowd asking what kind of drink orders everyone wanted. We of course got a Cola to try and get some sugar and caffeine into us since we were having a hard time staying awake at this point.
After the wedding David, his wife Felicte and Jocelyn (the director of THARS) took us to dinner at a restaurant. We ate a traditional Burundian meal and you can see pictures of it in our video. The fish that Carlos ate was called Mukeke (Mah kake ke) and it is only found in Lake Tanganyika that borders the city Bujumbura. It was a great time to sit and relax and enjoy the company after our long trip. We returned to David’s home and our small guest house and went a long awaited good night’s sleep.
Day 2: Driving To Gitega
We started the day in Bujumbura (the capital city of Burundi), but in the afternoon we drove to the former capital city of Gitega. It is about a two hour drive up the beautiful hills of Burundi and it is much cooler. Bujumbura temperature is around 85 degrees with 80% humidity and Gitega is about 70 degrees. Gitega has a training campus for the THARS organization. We will be living here for the next five days.
Day 3-6: Training & Games
The next few days we continued with training and playing games, such as spoons, dodgeball, uno, trainwreck, and snowball fight (with crinkled up paper!).
Day 7: Graduation Day!
